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Jealousy or to Control, will it kill Love?

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Post by Annika Sun 13 Jul 2008, 11:32

Morena has a very interesting thougth which she wrote in Love poems.

Qoute: "The poem by Oscar Wilde made me think about the reasons we can kill somebody we love. Is it becasue the loved one can control us in a way we don't want to be controlled? Love could be like a drug, that we love consuming it, but deep down we hate it, because it can control us and we feel dependent on it. Who knows? Try not to kill love, cause in the end it's all we've got!!" Qoute.

Let's talk about it.
Annika
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Post by Annika Sun 13 Jul 2008, 11:40

Well is it really love if you control someone or is it just pure jealousy in a bad way. In either way it will kill love slowly.
and if you "kill" love slowly will love really be there in the end or not????

What is everyone's opinion about the thought??
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Post by Naki Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:57

Try not to become a man/woman of success but rather try to become a man/woman of value when you have those then nothing can kill love.Nothing can ruin a relationship or marriage faster than jealously.Jealousy creates anxiety, anger, loneliness, hate, fear. No one thinks clearly when jealous.Having a relationship with a jealous person is tough. The jealous person acts untrusting or unworthy. Jealousy makes the person unattractive, even repulsive.
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Post by Annika Wed 16 Jul 2008, 21:16

Naki wrote:Try not to become a man/woman of success but rather try to become a man/woman of value when you have those then nothing can kill love.Nothing can ruin a relationship or marriage faster than jealously.Jealousy creates anxiety, anger, loneliness, hate, fear. No one thinks clearly when jealous.Having a relationship with a jealous person is tough. The jealous person acts untrusting or unworthy. Jealousy makes the person unattractive, even repulsive.

I agree with you Naki. Nothing can ruin a relationship or a marriage as fast as Jealousy can do. Taking the road of jealousy will only go one way...

Jealousy will only cause a lot of pain because it only shows no respect, it is being dishonest toward the other part, it makes the jealous person suspicious of everything which cause only hate, anger, unsecurity, anxiety, fear and a big lonliness in the relationship between a man/woman.
A jealous person is for sure very unatractiv, discusting and pathetic.
It might lead to stalking (persecution) of the other half in the relationship. It could also cause the other part to do bad things which will lead to even worse things which I see a lot in my work at the hospital.


A person with good values who knows how to respect others, who put love, trust, honesty etc, etc...first, then love will be around forever.
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Post by sirena Mon 21 Jul 2008, 01:36

what everyone is saying about jealousy and what jealous people can do when they become obsessed about thigs that couse this "illnes "called ( jealousy ) is true ,i agree with you as well about the above naki as you mentioned some of what the person who will get the virus will suffer and it is something myself think, some who luckely try to controle it get better instead the rest live with it for the rest of their life...
jealousy is the worse thing someone can be , is what mostly kills love for girlfriend, wife, parents, brother,kids friendship or even them selves ,..
jealousy leads to end of everything beautfull and good in life...!
sirena...
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Post by Naki Mon 21 Jul 2008, 08:45

As you may have gathered from the above explanations, jealousy can be unhealthy or healthy depending on your motivation.
Unhealthy jealousy stems from fear, insecurity, deception, or covetousness. When you feel yourself acting out in jealousy, you need to examine the reason why you feel jealous.
When jealous feelings come up, it's usually because we're afraid that we won't get our needs of one kind or another met. It's been our experience that when jealousy comes up, somewhere within us, we are crying out for help instead ti fight with it.
Myself i think there are only two emotions: Love and Fear.
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Post by Angelina Fri 22 Aug 2008, 14:05

First of all, you really shouldn’t be having this problem. It’s unfair to your partner who completely trusts you. Jealousy will kill a relationship unless you put an end to it before it becomes your disease. You know why, because jealous people tend to behave badly being misled by their fears – you start saying things you don’t mean and start having suspicious thoughts you actually believe in. Save your love by controlling your jealousy.
I prefer with these suggestions:
1. Deal with your insecurity
2. Value the virtue of trust
3. Love and trust go hand in hand
Don’t push your boyfriend away with your jealousy. If you know in your heart that your boyfriend is truly faithful, then it is just right that you trust him not to break your heart. The two of you can always talk when something starts to bother you so that it doesn’t evolve into a jealous fit.

PS/ Naki u are so right i like ur words cig
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Post by benita krusha Tue 26 Feb 2013, 09:17

Love should be based in trust... Being a good jealous in the right moment and for the right reason, just will strengthen the relation sheep, but being jealous for everything, than you realize that you don`t trust to your partner, and when you don`t have trust, you will kill the love very badly.
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Post by Naki Wed 27 Feb 2013, 05:01

benita krusha wrote:Love should be based in trust... Being a good jealous in the right moment and for the right reason, just will strengthen the relation sheep, but being jealous for everything, than you realize that you don`t trust to your partner, and when you don`t have trust, you will kill the love very badly.
That's true what you said but let me say smth more about this. Actually, you don't have to fall into the same pit and jeopardizing your precious relationship if you're equipped with the proper knowledge and understanding. Knowledge is power. So, controlling jealousy will be much easier if we can can know and understand the nature of jealousy and the root of our jealousy.
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Post by benita krusha Wed 27 Feb 2013, 08:49

Naki wrote:
benita krusha wrote:Love should be based in trust... Being a good jealous in the right moment and for the right reason, just will strengthen the relation sheep, but being jealous for everything, than you realize that you don`t trust to your partner, and when you don`t have trust, you will kill the love very badly.
That's true what you said but let me say smth more about this. Actually, you don't have to fall into the same pit and jeopardizing your precious relationship if you're equipped with the proper knowledge and understanding. Knowledge is power. So, controlling jealousy will be much easier if we can can know and understand the nature of jealousy and the root of our jealousy.

This is true dear, but the root of our jealousy can be the low self-trust without any fault of our partner... this is what i call sick jealousy my dear... You cant control your jealousy when the root of it comes from your brain, your imagination... This is the problem... When you have the proper knowledge and understanding for your partner, but you have problem with your self-trust, then you cant control it... You always will think that your partner is better then you and in every moment will live with fear that he/she will find someone better than me (no meter if this probability exist only in your brain)... This is the root of sick jealousy that you never can be able to control. Your partner in that case should have more nerves to break and to heal you from it, for the sake of love, no meter how much time it will cost for him/her. Smile
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Post by Naki Wed 27 Feb 2013, 15:31

True what writen above but keep in mind whenever you have a sexual urge in your mind or feel sexually attracted to somebody, jealousy enters. However jealously enters only because you are not in love. If you are in love, you won’t be jealous. Very Happy
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Post by benita krusha Wed 27 Feb 2013, 15:41

Naki wrote:True what writen above but keep in mind whenever you have a sexual urge in your mind or feel sexually attracted to somebody, jealousy enters. However jealously enters only because you are not in love. If you are in love, you won’t be jealous. Very Happy

I do not agree with you in that last point... Just if you sincerely love someone, you will be jealous for her/him !!!
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Post by Naki Wed 27 Feb 2013, 15:52

Very Happy Try to understand clearly what i wrote.
Also keep in mind the old proverb Jealousy is always born with love, but does not always die with it Very Happy
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Post by benita krusha Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:41

Naki wrote: Very Happy Try tu understand clearly what i wrote.
Also keep in mind the old poverb Jealousy is always born with love, but does not always die with it Very Happy

Now YESSS I agree with you
Peace bro ;)
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